Naked Rent

I blew my nose first, this time.

- David

Mm, Attractive

Forays into video blogging! Via Viddler, which is pretty cool.

- David

Glendora

Meeeeeeeeh. Hung over has turned into down and out. I'm sick. Sweats, sore throat, runny orifices, the whole bit. I woke up last night and put on a bunch of clothes cuz I was freezing, then preceded to sweat my ass off. This morning I feel better than last night and I'm currently overdosing on vitamin C, so let's hope I can bust this thing out. I have a job interview(s) coming up.

Speaking of, I need to find a public library so I can print out my application for Department of Defense security clearance. Not Top Secret, mind you, but Secret is still pretty cool. I wonder if I'll get a card. Next time I get carded for a big scary rated R movie, I'll flash that bitch in their faces.

Last night I had a dream right out of some Quentin Tarantino film, if he had a bicycle obsession and had just watched a documentary on LARPing. I busted into a hotel room filled with three pudgy, pasty fantasy-type geeks and proceeded to interrogate and terrorize them with my mini U-lock. I have nothing against LARPing or geeks of any type, just for the record. But you can take my word for it, they had it comin'.

I'm going to get ready for the day, before my virus decides to come back for round two and knock me out on the couch.

Adios.

- David

Good Times, Good Times

My buddy Jeff's last ride with the P-Town crew before he moves to Montana.

It's got to be a besotted Jesus to keep me satisfied. Nothing bad happened to it, promise.

I'm a bit hungover. Last night we hit up the Bier Garden with Jeff and crew as a send off, even though he doesn't leave until this upcoming Saturday. I drank liberally and had a lot of fun. I'm paying today, but not enough that I regret it. Even though Kasey doesn't agree, I do feel there is a certain type of enjoyable hangover. Like being sore after a good workout.

I need to find me some chocolate. Peace.

- David

Not About Bicycles

I feel sick. Nauseousness, just on the outside of my perception. Like I've been breathing some kind of heavy gas and it's stuck, swirling slowly, in my chest.

It could be that I haven't been taking my vitamins lately, or that I'm probably protein deficient. After a few weeks my vegetarian system starts to notice that kind of thing.

Or it could be the result of trying to stay so chipper when things are total crap. Buddhists and laid back people have a lot of pressure to continue being Buddhist and laid back, even when our lives are falling apart. A lot of that pressure is internal. It can be a huge bitch. We can be the rock and the refuge for our loved ones, but when shit goes down on our end of town, it seems like we just have to deal. And if there's conflict, guess who feels compelled to make it right, to calm down, to fix it. To forgive and forget. That's right. But maybe it's just me.

Shit is going down on my end of town.

What good is being introspective if you're the only one? What good is it to be mindful of the reasons behind things when no one else is concerned? Why be one of those "nice guys" when being insensitive seems so much easier? I don't think I'm cut out for this.

But a ship that goes out to sea either keeps sailing, or it sinks. So, whatever. This will all be discounted as dramatization anyway. Even though to me, it definitely isn't. But that won't matter. After a time I'll go on my merry way, no assistance or effort required, as always. So why bother with any of this.

Woo, happy Friday.

- David

What Are You Holding Out For?

If I can be allowed to steal from a friend...

In Stereo

It's all just a bunch of vibrations. It's all not that important. Don't take it too seriously. Everything is gonna be alright.

- David

Fer Real

Time to spend your money getting liquid out of a different kind of nozzle.

Maybe it's my advancing years, but I'm able to enjoy beer more lately. I'm more a girly-drink drunk myself. But after a hard bike ride (which is usually when I'm invited to imbibe) a beer goes down easy. Perhaps just as hunger is the best spice, dehydration is the best flavor.

Werky time, catch you later.

- David

Have fun, but be safe with it. Just kidding, fuck shit up!

Heysoos Cristo

I have no energy. I'm like a fresh zombie, only doing things out of blind habit. I keep stuffing candy and fruit into my slack maw to no effect.

Hence this post. I'm just sitting in this chair, head falling back, mouth open, numb fingers flailing across the keyboard like a those spin brushes in a car wash.

The wind was shitty this morning. Twenty-plus miles per hour assaulting Y.T., only helping for about two-percent of the route. The upside of all this crazy ass wind though is people ask, "Did you ride yesterday/today?" and when you say yes they go, "Unbelievable." You can tell they're jealous. "Man, I wish I could get my ass blown all over hell and back like David." Oh you can my friend. You definitely can. The key is to only think about the temperature, not the other meteorological phenomenon.

I have $.80. It's awesome. But not really. I get paid Friday. Kasey has $20. The way our household works, this means she is now the Man of the House and gets to sit on the couch with her hand in her pants while I clean the kitchen, demand oral satisfaction, and come home smelling like cigars and cheap beer after hanging out at the bowling alley. It's a fair system, I feel. Even though when I'm in the top spot none of that stuff ever happens for me. One day though, one day!

[REC] is scary as balls. Hopefully the remake (Quarantine) is good. I had my hands up to my face and Kasey made fun of me, then not five minutes later she was doing the same thing. It's very well done, it's worth finding and watching. Plus, you get a hear a lot of SPAINish swearing, which is cool. And I can guarantee you'll never look at baggy underpants and hammers the same way. A la meirda!

I rode My Girl Friday into work today (which is the newest and hopefully lastest name for the mixte) and every time I get up a good cadence I always marvel at how smooth she is for being around fourty. This is the first big commute she's been on since St. Gordon overhauled the bottom bracket, and it's perfect. And with my recent adjustments to the seat position my knee isn't bitching anymore.

Be Your Own Pet is pretty rad. I was listening to The Slip exclusively for days on end, but now they're duking it out for play time. I'm the kinda guy who finds a new band and just plays the album over and over until someone better comes along or those around me threaten physical violence. Which, is kinda how I am with the ladies too. Hmm. Interesting. Plus, any band with a song about cycling around and being a dick is pretty cool.

Lordy. I still have an hour left.

I'm gonna go and pretend to do other stuff. Take care. Be safe. Eat it.

- David

How you like my l33t special effects?

Cheap Ain't Always A Bad Thing

Cuz if people never went for the cheap option, I'd never get taken out on any dates.

Seeing as how it's Spring and we're midway into National Bike Month, I figure a lot of people are maybe possibly thinking about considering getting a bicycle and actually trying to ride it with regularity.

To these people, I salute you whole-handedly. Way back in the day (I think some of you may have been born then) when I decided to start riding into work I was full of excitement; I was gonna save the planet, get tan, lose weight, save money, and be awesome all at the same time. And I'm here to tell you, it's even better than all that. It's not something you can tell another person, you can just try to persuade them to find out for themselves.

That being said, possible pedal pioneers, you have a lot of choices to make. Gear being the foremost among them.

Buying a new bike can be a big pain in the ass. An exciting pain in the ass, but a pain in the ass none the less. What king of bicycle should you get? From whom? Are you getting the right price? What secondary equipment do you need? I'm not here to answer any of these questions beyond advising you keep a few tenets in mind: "The right tool for the job." and "Cheap ain't a four letter word." Maybe also, "If he loves you, he'll wait."

Tell the sales associate (if you're visiting an actual shop, which I also advise) what your primary use for the bicycle is going to be. Are you going to commute to work on level, paved street surfaces? Then the knobbly tires and geometry of a mountain bike probably isn't what you need, and may very well fuck with your chi. There are a million people who commute in the the wind, rain, and snow without mountain bikes. But then again, if you live in the forested badlands of deepest Idaho you may need a mountain bike. Everyone has different needs.

Talk to lots and lots of people to find out what could fit your needs best. Go to different bike shops, look around online, talk to someone who has commuted by bike before. They will all be more than happy to talk to you about it. In fact, you may have a hard time getting some the commuters to shut up. Their experience is handy and should be considered, but taken with a grain of salt.

Now, some people (sales reps and people with a ton of disposable income) may push bicycles and products that seem way overpriced. Chances are, they are. You do not need to spend large amounts of money to start riding to work/the store/wherever. You are probably not going to be road racing alongside any Frenchmen or Italians, so you probably don't need the same bikes that they have. Carbon is cool and all, but so is eating something besides Ramen Noodles.

Bicycling is the cheap alternative to other modes of transportation. Don't forget that. Yes, you have to spend money on it, but it shouldn't be breaking your wallet.

As an example, eight months ago I wrecked the beach cruiser I'd been using to commute and had to buy another bike. With a little luck and a lot of web surfing I found the bike I've been using ever since, with no problems or detriment, for $350 delivered. This may sound like a lot of money, but comparatively it's not. Compared against the $600+ Trek bikes I see around a lot and the multi-thousand-dollar bikes successful yuppies and Disposable Incomers ride around, it's nothing. I bet if you looked around even more you could find something just as good as Jenny for even less.

As you get more settled into the cycling environment you'll invariably find upgrades and niftier, spendier bicycles and bicycle parts. When I first started I couldn't see the merit of buying clipless shoes and pedals. I just didn't see how I'd benefit from spending the money. As time went on I found they'd probably do me some good, and one Nashbar sale later I was pedalin' pretty with a new pair of Eggbeater pedals and Cannondale shoes for about the price of the shoes themselves.

Right off the bat I'd exercise a little prudence. Which is rare advice coming from me, as I'm usually an all or nothing kinda guy. Wait until you know you're able and willing to commit to cycling before you commit a lot of your dough to it. Start small and slow, and then grow as you go along. You're less likely to waste your cash and time that way. You're also more apt to enjoy and appreciate the new stuff you get.

Find a cheap bike that won't fall apart on you. If you're really on the cheap (as we've all been and probably will be again) look at eBay or Craig's List for a used bike you can cut your teeth on. Local bike shops usually have something that will do the job, and the advice and knowledge the have can be indispensable. Once you have a general idea of what you want, look around. Search online. Take your time. The more patient you are the more likely you are to find a good deal.

In closing, I really do hope a lot of people take to the streets via leg-power this year. It's cheap, it's healthy, and most of all, it's fun.

- David

Three Free Day Weekend

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(I realize it's now Thursday. I been a lazy poster.)

This weekend the bossman let Y.T. out of his cage a whole day early, which he spent driving to Washington D.C. to see the amazing, the adorable, the British, Eddie Izzard with the assistance and special company of his lovely lady and navigator.

He was fantabulous. It was so awesome to see this person I'd been listening to and laughing at for years and years in real life. He's currently touring for his new show "Stripped" and DC is only the second city in the tour. Check TicketMaster.com or something and see if he's coming near you. It's well worth it.

I was paying attention to an older, substitute-teacher type lady in the row in front of us who had apparently gotten there because her daughter/granddaughter was a fan. At first she wasn't really into all this weirdness, with transvestite talk and the like, but two minutes in she was busting up and enjoyed herself all the way through.

Before the show we walked around a bit of DC, enjoying the early summer weather and the monuments and memorials the area had to offer. Took some pics, saw some baby geese, sat on some benches, damned tourists and the general public, all that stuff. Then we chilled out in the truck a bit with the windows down, resting our weary feets. You can go to the coolest places on Earth, but if you don't have an adorable redhead who at least tolerates your physical presence, then it's just not as good.

We got home at about 2:30 in the A.M. Saturday morning and fell asleep around 2:31. I spent some time at the bike shop later that day getting a front brake re-installed on Jenny (added to my running tab, of course) and then Kasey and I went Downtown to have some pizza with Kurtz.

He'd recently been in an accident on his bicycle, causing his front rim to become untrueable (a word I will be copy writing shortly), his ribs to bruise, and the sheath on his big ass chain to become ripped. Luckily that was the only damage sustained. Some good news on his part though, he recently had a set of his photography and writeography (I'm on a roll today) published in a magazine. Peep it here. You can also see the fun and skill has with a camera in this set in which patrons of a Roaring 20's party on Saturday posed for mugshots. He's the guy with the awesome mustache.

Speaking of Kurtz, Kasey, and I, we had little (mis)adventure on Sunday.

I had just set out for some reconnaissance concerning mermaids and Downtown Norfolk for an upcoming race when my phone began bleeping at me. It was the woman, and she was in distress. According to her, the truck had suffered a flat tire and now there was "no space between the main part and the ground" which I took to mean it was entirely flat. The tire wasn't flat, just low. Which $.50 seems to have fixed.

After recruiting Kurtz for the adventure of biking from Ghent to Virginia Beach we headed to my office first so that I could attempt to map the second half of the journey out. Which didn't work out that well. I wrote down two separate sets of directions, and somehow we got off track on both as you can see. And it really was an adventure. Between getting "lost" and watching Kurtz expertly chuck his bike over an twelve foot fence where it landed softly on a nearby bush, I had a good time.

This post is long enough. This ending may be abrupt, but I could always cop-out and say I'm leaving it open for a sequel. Which I'm not.

- David

Construct0r

There's a fair bit of construction going on around my commutin' parts lately. I blame the nice weather.

However today I discovered for that the entire area seen above, they are resurfacing that shit all at once. Right now the road from curb to curb is raw, jagged scraped off lines that vibrate my bicycle so badly my hands begin to itch through my tape and padded gloves.

It is just me, or is that a huge stretch for a single construction crew of not more than a ten men to be handling at once?

- David

DC Pics

Virgins, originally uploaded by BodhiDave.

Click the pic to see more. There's a couple good ones in there, if Y.T. can say so himself. That Hello Kitty camera o' mine does some cool things sometimes.

It's late, I need to sleep.

Nighty.

- David

My Heart Is Broken

And I'm not even kidding.

I've just discovered that gelatin, which is in everything from those delicious blue and white gummy sharks to some desserts to Jello, is extracted from "bones, connective tissues, organs, and some intestines of animals such as the domesticated cattle, and horses." Sweet fucking candy contains the leftovers from slaughterhouses.

Also, not ten minutes ago, I found out that most candy from the Mars Corporation (Snickers, M&Ms, etc) contains whey processed with rennet, which they get from the stomachs of young cows as a by-product of the veal industry.

This means that as a vegetarian I've been unknowingly ingesting animals for years now. And not even the yummy bits y'all enjoy. The gross stuff you'd figure they'd just toss out.

I can't even describe what this means for me. In one regard, I'm horrified and disgusted to think that for years now I've still been eating animal parts. I don't choose to be a vegetarian; the thought of eating another animal makes me sad and sick. And this whole time I've been eating intestines and bones form cows and horses. Imagine if someone came up to you and said, "Hello! I know you've been careful about not eating puppies and kittens and your own beloved household pets, but for the last 2.5 to 3 years, you have been." That's how I feel.

In another regard, this means unless I find some sweets that explicitly list themselves as vegetarian, my sweet tooth is screwed. And I have a big sweet tooth. Or a lot of little ones, depending.

I'm not a nutritionist. Lots of people, vegetarian, vegan, or carnivorous, are not nutritionists. They don't know what riboflavin is or where it's derived from. Without Googling or going to Wikipedia, tell me what dextrin is and where it comes from. Tell me how the whey in your food is processed. I'd bet dollars to donuts you don't know any better than I do.

I feel so disillusioned, so lied to. Why can't packaging be upfront about it's contents? Labels appear to be required to notify consumers if their contents contain, or are even processed in the same plant, as peanuts and other things people could be allergic to. Why not meat and meat by-products? "Warning: This product contains animal by-products." That's all it'd take.

I guess I'm going to have to make myself a laminated 3x5" card with all these sneaky ingredients on it and carry it around with me. God, I didn't want to have to be that guy.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cry and/or drink myself to sleep.

- David