Gather 'Round Children

And let this old timer tell you a story.

Once upon a time, coming up on thirty minutes now, a boy was just settling into his cubicle for the day. Life was good; he had his S'more Poptarts and his coffee, and it just happened to be Friday.

Before buckling down and beginning the trudge through his daily e-mail he engaged in good-natured tomfoolery with his co-workers, as he often did. Sophisticated humor aimed at each other's mothers and creative suggestions for new department names were tossed back and forth with much wit and mirth.

Our young friend suggested to one tall office companion that his department should read "DVDA" in the company employee directory. The vacant (yet still smiling) expression on said companion's face told our friend that this acronym was unknown to him, and therefor the humor was lost.

Not wishing to explain "DVDA" out loud (lest he offend the gentler cubicle residents within earshot) he opted instead to use the internal instant messenger. Pulling up the contact list and carelessly selecting the first name of his office mate, he entered only:

double-vaginal double-anal

A short second later, dear reader, a hearty and raucous laugh was heard just down the hall. Just down the hall, from inside the boss' office. The boss who just happens to share the same first name as our friend's intended target.

In the industry we refer to this as a "mistell".

Realizing the classic mistake he had made, his face flushed immediately and the boy went down the hall quickly to explain himself. Luckily our hero's boss had a solid sense of humor and had replied in jest to the horribly NSFW comment, saying simply, "Is that an offer?"

The moral of the story is: Don't send anything HR would be having a talk with you over before you've finished your coffee.

- David

Dodged a bullet.