Daily Conversations

Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

David Buchta [3:41 PM]:
I didn't know you was dieting
Ralacy! [3:44 PM]:
Well I went to my doctor yesterday for a physical and he told me that I should lose 10 pounds
David Buchta [3:44 PM]:
Meany1
David Buchta [3:44 PM]:
My doctor always says I'm perfect the way I am
Ralacy! [3:44 PM]:
and the guys at the gym told me that I have 20% body fat
Ralacy! [3:44 PM]:
hahah
David Buchta [3:44 PM]:
My gymnist always says I'm at 100% perfect
David Buchta [3:44 PM]:
However, both of them are my cat so I don't know if they're licensed
Ralacy! [3:45 PM]:
hahaha
Ralacy! [3:45 PM]:
OMG

---

David Buchta [2:22 PM]:
Scott's fiance wants me to wear a dress to her wedding
Teh Adrians [2:23 PM]:
she obviously has no qualms about you appearring fruity
David Buchta [2:23 PM]:
lol
David Buchta [2:23 PM]:
I think she wants an upskirt shot
Teh Adrians [2:24 PM]:
she needs to see meat wrapped in silk
David Buchta [2:24 PM]:
haha
David Buchta [2:25 PM]:
A silk thong does make me feel awfully pretty
David Buchta [2:25 PM]:
Emphasis on awful
Teh Adrians [2:25 PM]:
I think I just threw up a bit in my mouth
David Buchta [2:25 PM]:
haha

---

Aero Perfecto
11:14
I think the ocean is hiding that secret
BuddhaDave
11:14
heh
Aero Perfecto
11:15
just you wait
we gonna be like
"oh we gonna die!"
and I'm gonna look over to you
and be like
"I friggin told you"
BuddhaDave
11:15
lol
And I'll just be nodding
Laying on some grass with my hands laced together behind my head
Aero Perfecto
11:17
no , we gonna have swords
no time for relaxation mang
shits going down
BuddhaDave
11:18
haha, hotness
I'll be that total laid back character that always looks like he's on the edge of a nap, but moves total fast when he has to at the drop of a hat
Wah!
Aero Perfecto
11:21
haha, I'm down with that

---

Ingrid Bergman [2:14 PM]:
Where were you last night? I waited forever but you never came. :'(
David Buchta [2:14 PM]:
omg
David Buchta [2:14 PM]:
Ingrid look: We had some laughs and some great times, but it's over now.
David Buchta [2:15 PM]:
Please understand, I'm moving away and well...
Ingrid Bergman [2:15 PM]:
Well what? Is it because I'm only in black and white? That's it isn't it!
Ingrid Bergman [2:15 PM]:
My mother was right, oh she was right. Never date those colored boys.
David Buchta [2:16 PM]:
Colored?! You mean IN color right
Ingrid Bergman [2:16 PM]:
Jerk! You know I can't help it!
Ingrid Bergman [2:21 PM]:
Hello, are you still there?!
David Buchta [2:30 PM]:
Sorry, bathroom
David Buchta [2:30 PM]:
Ingrid look honey, it's not that. I love white skin. You look so classy.
Ingrid Bergman [2:31 PM]:
Don't try to flatter me now, hillybilly! Whitetrash! What is it then!
David Buchta [2:31 PM]:
It's, well. I don't want to hurt your feelings...
Ingrid Bergman [2:31 PM]:
Oh ho, too late for that mister!
David Buchta [2:31 PM]:
Alright. Well, you're dead! And I'm not! We just are heading in different directions!
Ingrid Bergman [2:34 PM]:
Oh. Well... Oh. I see.
David Buchta [2:34 PM]:
Are you, are you okay?
David Buchta [2:37 PM]:
...
Ingrid Bergman [2:39 PM]:
I'm fine. I'm fine. Have a good life, with your livingness and being more alive than me!
Ingrid Bergman [2:39 PM]:
Just know, I wasted the best years of my death on you!
[Ingrid Bergman has signed off]
David Buchta [2:39 PM]:
Women.

- David

True story.
Did you know that humor is my most commonly used self-defense mechanism?